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About a year ago I went to see a shaman, curious as to know what he saw about me, I asked his clairvoyant self, to which choosing from his observations answered directly “You my dear have abandoned yourself, and thus let yourself open to abuse”.
Wow, this response reminded me that I still hadn't recovered from some bad experiences, I was lead into grief and felt the responsibility for my life and clearing this injustice. The advice of Eckhart Tolle resounded in this passing telling me I had 3 choices in any given situation, to Accept, to Leave or to Change. I knew I had to change what was being reflected to me in order to grow by instead learning how to be present with whatever is and realising the opposite of abuse.
From then on I spread the message that Love is not just a visceral positive vibration, but a by-product of being understood and seeing oneself in all others. I had to get to know more about the things that had happened in my life and ancestry, see that they occurred with limited consciousness of their affect, forgive and then get to know what really pushed me forward in this life, because if I was to progress, all those connected to me would benefit.
I wonder have you noticed that when something you value is not around it literally feels like you're missing part of yourself? This I discovered is the disconnection that happens within us when we lose our common presence and forget our values. I discovered this separation can be reunited by remembering what our needs and desires were and through acts of love and understanding, seeing everything in our reality in a state of oneness, we can consciously create an emotionally, mentally and physically feel good environment.
So taking a breather from this text, as an experiment, what would happen if you were to stop right now, look inwards, eyes closed and say “I love myself”. A few seconds, up to a minute, is all it takes to tune in, find out something about yourself, you may never have known before.
So what sort of response did you get from your inner world in regards this self loving affirmation? Did it feel 100% true? Did any sensations, emotions, colours, textures, sounds or memories crop up? And how did you meet these aspects? All are indicators as to the relationship you have with yourself, so the more relaxed you can be, the more you can receive, without the ego denying or rejecting anything that threatens its sense of safety, it's a practise in feeling what's presently real.
My intention for writing this article is to show that the relationship you have with yourself is what sets the tone for all those around you. So if we are to be healthy, holistic, well rounded human beings and ecosystems living in community, happily fulfilled without lack of anything, then whatever information is key to finding out what aspects of ourselves may need some attention before making decisions that affect those which we value as part of our wellbeing.
So from now on, forgive notions that equate self love with selfishness, or being 'full of oneself', because on the contrary once you are self fulfilled that good feeling will naturally spill out onto everyone else. And please forget that being selfless is a good thing because anything you do for anyone else should be in the best interests of both of yourselves, if it isn't you may end up worse than you were before, kicking not loving yourself. Your needs and wants are valid, you have a right to have them understood, interpreted and pursued. As Rumi famously said "love is the bridge between you and everything". So pay attention to your values over that bridge, use feedback as the blocks that will securely build it and be courageous in defending it's worth.
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